Four Step Coaching Formula To Make New Year’s Resolutions Work for You
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Four Step Coaching Formula To Make New Year’s Resolutions Work for You

Talyaa Vardar, MA, FCPC, MCC
Talyaa Vardar, MA, FCPC, MCC
Executive Coach, Psychologist & Art Therapist

New Year’s Resolutions is something that everyone gets on when the new year comes around. People are ready to end the year and look forward to the new year. With each new year comes a promise of growth, change, and new experiences.

It’s no surprise why New Year’s Resolutions are a thing that a lot of people get into during the new year. It gives people a sense of rebirth and that now they have this new chapter to replace the old one that probably did not go so well.

This annual ritual cultivates hope for what there is to come and what we want to create. It gives us a sense of optimism and control over our life. However, a lot of these resolutions don’t get executed in the end.

First, what are your resolutions? 

  • Are you aiming for a healthier version of yourself?
  • Are you hoping to finish what you have been procrastinating on the most?
  • Are you wanting to adopt a more optimistic view of yourself and your life?
  • Are you planning on learning some new skills?
  • Are you wanting to cultivate new habits, such as regular exercise?

Whatever your resolutions are, they are on your list because they are important to you.

Research tells us that only 70% of change initiatives are successful. The majority of change management initiatives are not accomplished because most people are not aware that our brain does not like change and it is not good at managing it. Our brain is actually designed to resist change and it perceives change as a source of threat to our survival.

FLOW Coaches are trained with certain coaching skills to impart effective change management and they learn a special coaching formula to support their clients in managing successful and meaningful change in their personal and professional lives.

This formula is called the Four Steps Coaching Formula of Change Management.

Applying the steps of this formula helps our brain to shift its focus from perceiving it as a threat to understanding it as an improvement or opportunity that comes with change. Therefore, the brain can be trained to cooperate with us instead of resisting change.

Here is our Four Steps Coaching Formula to Change Management that will help you accomplish your New Year’s resolutions. Each step requires you to ask yourself powerful coaching questions and answer them with special attention.

Step 1: Describe your pain

The first step of the formula is to start describing what makes you unhappy or uncomfortable. Our survival brain tries to move away from pain or discomfort. By acknowledging our pain points, we are helping our brain take the first step in controlling the negativity and thus, its consequences.

Step 2: Describe your vision

The second step is to ask yourself what do you want to cultivate. If you were able to move away from what gives you pain or discomfort, what would you like to create instead? When you describe your vision, think about it in terms of being, having, and doing so that it is sustainable for you.
Who would you like to become in your vision?

What skills, resources, knowledge, and experiences do you want to gain? What would you like to do about it? When you are answering these questions, clearly visualize your answers. This will help your brain build the connections between your lower systems and upper cortex.

Step 3: Describe your actions

This third step of the change formula is about describing the steps you need to take towards making the change real in your daily life. What are some action steps that you can take every day? As we always keep repeating at FLOW, “While praying move your feet.” What will your first step be?

Step 4: Be resilient

The last step is about taking ownership and accountability for your process. This requires you to build resiliency and tenacity in making change, including appreciating every win and being patient with the process. Don’t wait until the end to acknowledge achievement, but rather appreciate the small steps and wins along the way.

If you apply these four steps together, your brain will cooperate with you in managing the change, and you will overcome your inner resistance to change.

Imagine… while you practise these steps, at the end of the next year, you will look back and remember today as the first day of new habits… new beginnings… and positive change.

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