Your Career Is Not Your Destiny

Your Career Is Not Your Destiny 11 Month Ago · 5 min read

Talyaa Vardar

Talyaa Vardar, MA, FCPC, MCC
Executive Coach, Psychologist & Art Therapist

Imagine Ella – a 34-year-old banker with a small child. She is supposed to provide for her family and the sustenance of the household by working and contributing to the mortgage and bill payments. She drags her feet every morning when she goes to work. Her long hours mean that she is impatient and anxious at home. She hates to admit it, but she is jealous of the babysitter who seems to have more patience and spends more time with her daughter than she can. She is unhappy with her position at work and finds the people around her toxic.

Ella has big dreams for her future, however she doesn’t know how to get there. She does know she would love to make a living by finding her passion, but her inner voice tells her that it is too late and not possible. Fear and comfort have definitely gotten in the way. She tells herself that people don’t really like their jobs anyways, and her parents have advised her not to embark on a new adventure at her age. She often feels lonely and unsupported. Her body has begun to hurt – her belly, her neck, her head. She doesn’t know what to do but she does know she doesn’t want to get old and continue living this way. She has zero clue where to start making a change.

If you can resonate with Ella then I am telling you that you are not alone. Your career does not have to be your destiny. My wish is that you start taking the right steps after you read this article in order to understand that you deserve to be in a career you love. Yes, you have one and only one life, and change can happen even with a tiny seed of hope within you. However, making a change is a process and there are certain things you need in place like patience, persistence, excitement, love, compassion, and courage. Along with these characteristics, you need to plan with a rationalist approach, embark in some personal development, hire a professional coach, ask creative and strong questions, and consistently search for answers.

This second career will take some discernment in order to achieve what you are looking for. However there will be a sense of fulfillment as you explore this new path, and the satisfaction and pleasure that will come into your life because you decided to make a change will be worth every drop of sweat along the journey.

7 Step Career Coaching Guide

I prepared a 7-step career coaching guide to take with you on this road. Of course, each of these steps can be expanded upon, but listed here they are a practical way to help you get started and broaden your mind.

  1. One of the foundations of the journey is that you understand the tendencies that come up from your childhood. You need to know and confront your weaknesses. You need to reflect upon and adopt your strengths. I suggest you keep asking yourself creative coaching questions such as “What do I like?” and “What do I want?” as you travel along your path. In fact, literally taking a walk and asking these questions is a healthy way to reflect; the answers will come sooner or later.
  2. You need to be patient and persistent in this journey. Of course you may feel skeptical from time to time, and when this happens you need to talk to someone like a career coach or a therapist to refresh your belief. Just like Rumi says: “Come, come again!”
  3. It will help if you get involved in the research process. For instance, I suggest you make a list of occupations that you are interested in and talk with at least two people in the same career. Ensure that you prepare your questions in advance.
  4. Keeping a log or a journal about this journey will help you go back and see the difference between where you currently are and where you were. It is important to see how far you’ve come.
  5. Do not drive yourself into a tight corner by racing against money and time. If possible, carry out your inner explorations and research while working in your existing occupation. A shortage of time and money will make you panic and change won’t happen as a result.
  6. When you determine some ideas about your career, get equipped by receiving some further training about that field in order to support the growth of your abilities.
  7. Use any spare time to develop a network of people in the new career.

This guide is a great way to begin your journey to a new career destiny – the one that you deserve.